Survey says Beijing husbands are whipped, wife mother-in-law relationship worst in Shanghai

February 10th, 2012 by Key | Posted in Life Style | 12 Comments »

From Sohu:

Chinese New Year has passed. But many people are still immersed in the festive atmosphere. However no matter how lively the festival was, the common discussion topics are always revolving “relationship between the wife and mother in law” or “who has the final say” (in the family). Sohu conducted an online survey “How did you spend your Chinese New Year?” which more than 30,000 netizens’ participated in. Let the numbers show you how people enjoyed the 2012 Chinese New Year.

The survey involved a total of 12 questions and 48 choices, 37,080 people have participated (as of 2/6 2012).

Geographic distribution of total participations:

Shandong	11.95%
Hebei	7.57%
Beijing	7.32%
Jiangsu	7.06%
Guangdong	6.98%
Other area in China	5.77%
Zhejiang	4.56%
Other	40.02%

1. Who has the final say at home?

Wife	46.82%
Husband	46.11%
Husband’s Mother	5.48%
Wife’s Mother	1.59%

Conclusion: in the above 4 choices, “wife” and “husband” are 47% and 46%, so there are more (Chinese) family with wife being dominant at home, but husband is also important, numbers show almost equality between the sexes. At the same time survey shows the couple makes their own decisions in their own home, not much influence by elders of both sides.

Geographic distribution of people who selected Wife:

Shandong	10.67%
Hebei	7.23%
Beijing	7.71%
Jiangsu	6.59%
Guangdong	6.58%
Other area in China	5.83%
Zhejiang	4.42%
Other	41.68%

Geographic distribution of people who selected Husband:

Shandong	13.08%
Hebei	7.47%
Beijing	7.04%
Jiangsu	7.72%
Guangdong	7.23%
Other area in China	5.61%
Zhejiang	4.57%
Other	38.66%

Clearly, wives of Beijing and Zhejiang have the final say, and in Shandong, Jiangsu and Hebei husbands have the final say.

It is worth noting that number of people who chose “Wife’s mother” has the final say, Beijing is number one and Shanghai is also up there (in relation to total participation distribution).

Geographic distribution of people who selected Wife’s Mother

Beijing	8.36%
Jiangsu	8.19%
Hebei	8.01%
Guangdong	7.3%
Shandong	7.12%
Other area in China	5.61%
Shanghai	4.45%
Other	42.7%

2. Where did you have dinner on New Year’s Eve?

Husband’s family	46.67%
Our home	33.86%
Wife’s family	10.7%
Go to husband’s first then wife’s	5.92%
Go to wife’s first then husband’s	2.86%

3. In the past, where do you spend New Years more?

Husband’s family	61.86%
About the same	22.84%
Wife’s family	15.3%

4. Where do the kids like to go more?

Own home	33.87%
Grandma’s (father’s mother)	33.3%
Grandma’s (mother’s mother)	28.38%
Relatives’	3.13%
Friends’	1.32%

Conclusion: Combining #2, 3 and 4, 46.67% choose to spend New Year at husband’s home, which shows traditional influence, most of people choose to be in husband’s family during New Year. It is noteworthy that comparing data with previous years, number of people spending New Year in husband’s family reduced from 62% to 47%.

In the question “Where did you have dinner on New Year’s Eve?” People of Anhui were #1 in answering “Go to wife’s first then husband’s” .

5. This Chinese New Year, giving gifts to two sides of the family, which side did you spend more money on?

Same	50.43%
Wife’s family	26.68%
Husband’s family	22.89%

6. Who did more housework during Spring Festival?

Mother in law	40.2%
Wife	31.54%
Husband	25.95%
Sister in Law	2.3%

Data shows the elderly did more house chores during the Spring Festival.

7. During Spring Festival, how is wife’s relationship with mother in law?

No Change	52.54%
Better	29.97%
Good on the surface, but actually we don’t get along	14.74%
Sworn enemies	1.38%
Worsened	1.37%

Conclusion: The Spring Festival is an important holiday which plays a role of easing conflicts between in-laws. However deep-seated resentment is still difficult to resolve.

Data from Shanghai especially stood out, from the number of people in Shanghai who selected “Good on the surface, but actually we don’t get along” and “Sworn enemies” on question #7, we can see problem between wife and mother in-law is indeed more prominent in Shanghai.

Geographic distribution of people who selected “Good on the surface, but actually we don’t get along” and “Sworn enemies” on question #7:

Shandon	10.2%
Beijing	8.82%
Guangdong	6.86%
Jiangsu	6.27%
Other area in China	6.08%
Hebei	5.88%
Shanghai	4.31%
Other	41.57%

Compare to earlier question, “In the past, where do you spend New Years more?” more people in Shanghai selected Wife’s family, seems to have certain correlation.

Beijing	8.05%
Jiangsu	8.02%
Shandong	6.83%
Guangdong	6.77%
Other area in China	6.11%
Zhejiang	5.4%
Shanghai	4.6%

8. During the New Year, was there conflict because of 2 families having different customs?

No	68.35%
Tolerate each other	18.02%
Yes	13.63%

9. What did you do the must during Spring Festival?

Sleep in	30.46%
Go to relatives	27.97%
Be with parents	23.83%
Play cards/ Mahjong	10.33%
Get together with friends and classmates	7.42%

Conclusion: 30% of people selected “Sleeping in”, indicating modern Chinese people treat Spring Festival more as a holiday to rest up, to seize this rare seven-day holiday to catch up on sleep. At the same time, it shows people’s general state of exhaustion during Spring Festival.

Data also shows something interesting, Shanxi people like to meet up with friends and classmates.

Geographic distribution of people who selected “Get together with friends and classmates”:

 

Shandong	13.73%
Hebei	10.04%
Beijing	6.46%
Guangdong	6.1%
Other area in China	5.22%
Shanxi	4.09%
Other	40.05%

And people of Jiangsu like to play cards / Mahjong

Geographic distribution of people who selected “play cards / Mahjong”:

Jiangsu	8.99%
Shandong	7.97%
Guangdong	7.48%
Hebei	6.12%
Beijing	5.67%
Liaoning	5.07%
Other	43.4%

10. Are both families of the couple in the same city?

Geographic distribution of people who answered YES:

Shandong	12.87%
Hebei	7.97%
Jiangsu	7.56%
Beijing	6.76%
Guangdong	5.44%
Zhejiang	4.84%

Geographic distribution of people who answered NO:

Shandong	10.54%
Guangdong	9.24%
Beijing	8.19%
Hebei	7%
Jiangsu	6.36%
Other area in China	5.95%
Zejiang	4.28%

Conclusion: More people marry locals in Shandong, Hebei and Jiangsu. More people in Beijing and Guangdong have long distance marriages.

Summary:

1. As people’s living standard improves, the Spring Festival still remains as one of the most important traditional festivals, however the concept of the Spring Festival have faded. Except for the basic customs people must follow over the years, other extra stuff related to Spring Festivals has been simplified. With so many traditional festivals, Spring Festival now has more symbolic significance. In essence, most people look forward to Spring Festival not only to reunion with family, but are more about enjoyment of their leisure time.

2. During the Spring Festival, as a whole, conflict between wife and mother in law are able to be alleviated temporarily in most families. However, in some families conflict between wife and husband’s mother intensifies during the holiday, which is most typical in Jiangsu and Zhejiang provinces. It is also worth noting that significant number of people in Shanghai selected “Sworn enemies” when asked about relationship between wife and mother in law.

3. In more Chinese families, wife has the final say. However much more people still spend the Spring Festival in husband’s family, this could be that most people are still accustomed to the old traditions.

4. As for giving gifts, most families can balance and honor both families equally.

5. Survey also shows more elderly do house chores during Spring Festival, which reflects the hard-working older generation. Each young person should really think this over and reflect upon themselves.

Tags: Beijing, Culture, Funny, Marriage, Relationship, Shanghai, Spring Festival