How to be a real man, according to some Chinese guy

| February 17th, 2010

This is a slightly older post on Mop (from October 2009) but it has gotten over 20,000 comments (and a lot of support) and somehow it has reached the top of the charts again. It seems to reflect a lot of the mainstream sentiment of how to be a 爷们. I guess it would translate to something like “manly man,” or “real man,” but it should be interpreted in a Chinese context. Personally, I see it as a modern and trendy way to say “男子汉," which is why I put a picture of Lei Feng (雷锋) up above. I am somewhat of a feminist, and I don’t really agree with categorical prescriptions like this, but this is still very interesting to me from an anthropological perspective. There are some things that seem to be something only a Chinese person would say, but some things that seem like they might apply to everyone. I’d be interested to see what you would add to the list, or what you take away from the list.

From Mop:

As a man, especially to be a real man, you should do the following:

  1. If a friend treats you to dinner, do not take it for granted, or else your reputation will suffer.
  2. Give yourself a goal – one years, two years, five years. Maybe you weren’t born into the best situation, but through hard work, you can change about 70% of your fate. Losers have cowardly friends.
  3. This is a practical society, you cannot rely on emotions for meals, poor couples never make it. Don’t believe in the movies, they’re only to encourage strangers to develop relationships.
  4. Among your good friends, you must cultivate a really close friend, do not think you’re just slick and smooth with a lot of friends. In the end, there will only be one person that will treat you truly well, trust me.
  5. Do not believe in astrology, that’s just to coax children, your fate is in your own hands. Are you really going to wait around for a house or a car to appear?
  6. If you don’t like someone, don’t spend too much time with them, but don’t talk about people behind their backs.
  7. Don’t spend too much time playing games, this is not Korea, you can’t really “play” for a woman or a car.
  8. Learn English. Don’t mind those who say that learning English is not important. Either they’re old, or they’ve already passed the TOEFL or CET 6. You don’t need to get the certificate, but be sure to learn it well.
  9. Know what you need to do. In the dead of the night, ask yourself what are your future plans, and work toward that.
  10. Flip through some fashion magazines once in a while so that you can improve your taste.
  11. Try to look at porn less, even if you’re a regular single man, you don’t need to obsess over porn all day. And every time you masturbate you will lose a lot of zinc, and this element is closely linked with your brain.
  12. Drink a glass of water every morning, for this will prevent gallstones. Do not drink water in the hour before you go to bed, otherwise you will get dark bags under your eyes.
  13. Don’t sit around in bars during all your free time, read some literature, learn some business practices, management, international affairs, legal issues. This can guarantee that you have a way to make money.
  14. Everyone’s still young and doesn’t have that much money, don’t worry too much about who has Prada, Nike, etc. And your girlfriend’s passion for Prada, Lancome, Louis Vuitton, you don’t need to take too seriously. Women are born to care about beauty, they just want to know that you can buy them one expensive present to fulfill their vanity and then brag about it in front of their peers. Actually, they also love life, and when you do have the means to make them beautiful, you will also feel pleased.
  15. When you want to do something, before you succeed, you don’t need to tell other people.
  16. Keep your nails, hair, and beard neat. Society is inherently exclusive and there are only so many artists that this planet needs, so do not take this risk. Even if you look good with long hair, try to make it look clean.
  17. Do not think that since you are man, you do not need maintenance. At least don’t be too careless about what you eat. Eat more tomatoes, seafood, leeks, and bananas – these are all good for a man’s health. Even if you don’t see the value in doing this, let me tell you, at least you can save the money from going to the hospital to buy your girlfriend some Dior.
  18. Those who strive for excellence do not always rely on other people. People are all selfish, and you can really only rely on yourself.
  19. In the face of defeat, don’t freak out…but learn to take responsibility, find the reason, and change your bad habits. If you have no money at 20, that’s normal, no money at 30, that’s destiny, no money at 40, then you have become a woman.
  20. All men who see a good post will support it!

34 Comments | Leave a comment | Comment feed

  1. kimboslice says:

    I loved this list, especially # 19.

  2. Ivano says:


  3. Lop says:

    Seems like lots of the advice isn’t about being a man but just some general trivial stuff. When people say things like “You can change about 70 percent of your fate” you know you aren’t exactly looking at a pro’s work,, or to go to the other ditch: some crap you get to listen to at an overpaid hack’s seminars about personal development. Yes Tony Robbins,, I am looking at you.

    Also I think this advice is too much society based, too Chinese in a sense. There should be some universal truths in the Real-Man idea and not so much Its glorious to get rich crap.

    If there is such a concept as a real man (which I seriously doubt) then to me it would go something like this:

    Be honest and straight with your friends and family,, well to everyone.

    Do everything with moderation, playing games and having a drink with friends can be great fun but don’t let it take over your life.

    Do your best at work and in life in general. As long as one is doing his best noone can berate or belittle you.

    Never hit a woman and avoid violence as much as you can. In my book there is nothing manly about beating people up for looking at your gf in the wrong way. I think you’ll survive.

    Don’t spend your precious time on the wrong kind of girl and the wrong kind of friends. Life is just too damn short.

    Be generous to friends and family but don’t encourage uber-materialistic behaviour in your kids and your wife and keep a distance from leeching acquaintances.

    Take/make the time to spend on your family. Quality time. “I wish I had spent more time at the office” is something you rarely hear at someone’s deathbed.

    Remember your dreams from when you were young and try to fulfill them if your current life gives you the chance to do so. BUT remember that your priorities change when you have familiar responsibilities. Hiking around the world alone probably isn’t such a good idea when you have 2 kids back home who need their dad.

    Chivalry isn’t dead and although some women detest the idea that you don’t think they can open their own door,, well consideration won’t take anything away from you.

    Defend the weak and act when you see injustice. Nobody can hide their head in the sand forever. Don’t accept abuse or corruption.

    Be a good rolemodel. I am an atheist but the modern Christian saying “What would Jesus do?” has a certain moral appeal to me. Replace with “Gandhi” if you prefer.

    Encourage good behaviour in your kids. Education is important true but happiness is better so consider if your kid will be happier doing something he/she really wants in life than being an accountant because your wife wants it.

    If you loved playing baseball/soccer/basketball/whatever as a kid and a young man take the time to keep it up. It’s important exercise and a great way to take time off for a couple of hours in the weekend. Having fun while exercising is priceless.

    Sadly I cannot live up to these ideals but when I get kids of my own I certainly will try my best. Our kids deserve our best behaviour and our higest moral codes.

    Check out Bazz Luhrman (not sure of the spelling) and the poem/musicvideo “Everybody’s free (to wear sunscreen)”. Excellent and it never gets old. There is a long and interesting story behind the lyrics as well.

    • Amy Field says:

      The only thing needed to be a “real man” is to be recognised as biologically male. With a sex-change this is also possible. All the notions of “manly” and “real man” are social and cultural constructions so are various and are not universally accepted. The concept “manly” like the concept “womanly” is defined by the culture in which one is raised and is learned within a particlar culture or society and not innate. “One is not born a woman, but becomes one” [Simone de Beauvoir] . One learns how to be a woman or man according to different cultural ideas of what is expected of each.

      • Ed says:

        No, you are wrong. Masculinity is separate from character and society.

      • Burn the Witch says:

        Oh dear god, what “studies” major are you in college?

        Please spare the rest of the internet your academic new age bullshit. Regurgitating this nonsense is not only indicative of someone who has a poor education, but someone highly susceptible to brainwashing. If you paid for your education yourself, I suggest you petition your university for a refund, or that you switch your major if it’s not too late.

        If someone else (i.e. the taxpayer) funded your education, then keep your silly little mouth shut. Put down the books written by authors who are just trying to make money off of gullible souls like you who buy into this crap. You buy it because it plays to the part of you who will never realize that it’s your own substandard performance that’s holding you back.

    • LazyCat says:

      Desiderata ( Latin for “desired things” )

      Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
      and remember what peace there may be in silence.
      As far as possible without surrender
      be on good terms with all persons.
      Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
      and listen to others,
      even the dull and the ignorant;
      they too have their story.

      Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
      they are vexations to the spirit.
      If you compare yourself with others,
      you may become vain and bitter;
      for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
      Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

      Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
      it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
      Exercise caution in your business affairs;
      for the world is full of trickery.
      But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
      many persons strive for high ideals;
      and everywhere life is full of heroism.

      Be yourself.
      Especially, do not feign affection.
      Neither be cynical about love;
      for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
      it is as perennial as the grass.

      Take kindly the counsel of the years,
      gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
      Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
      But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
      Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
      Beyond a wholesome discipline,
      be gentle with yourself.

      You are a child of the universe,
      no less than the trees and the stars;
      you have a right to be here.
      And whether or not it is clear to you,
      no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

      Therefore be at peace with God,
      whatever you conceive Him to be,
      and whatever your labors and aspirations,
      in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

      With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
      it is still a beautiful world.
      Be cheerful.
      Strive to be happy.

      Max Ehrmann, 1927

  4. Dan says:

    Good article, i like it.

  5. Krizd says:

    This is funny

  6. LazyCat says:

    seems to me someone is afraid of Virginia Woolf

  7. SDS says:

    Basically the article is a load of crap for people who cannot think past the existential material junk society has deemed to be the marker of your destiny.

    There is only one principle to being a person: staying true to yourself. That’s that.

    • BornInTheUSA says:

      Yeah, look at Bush. It worked wonders for him, being himself in front of the camera.

      • Carl says:

        and ironically, some people still liked him. and that’s exactly how it should be. You can’t please everybody, anyone who tried and succeeded have lied and compromised their own beliefs.

  8. Georgeson says:

    If you’re reading this, you’re no doubt asking yourself, “Why did this have to happen?” The simple truth is that it is complicated and has been coming for a long time. The writing process, started many months ago, was intended to be therapy in the face of the looming realization that there isn’t enough therapy in the world that can fix what is really broken. Needless to say, this rant could fill volumes with example after example if I would let it. I find the process of writing it frustrating, tedious, and probably pointless… especially given my gross inability to gracefully articulate my thoughts in light of the storm raging in my head. Exactly what is therapeutic about that I’m not sure, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

    We are all taught as children that without laws there would be no society, only anarchy. Sadly, starting at early ages we in this country have been brainwashed to believe that, in return for our dedication and service, our government stands for justice for all. We are further brainwashed to believe that there is freedom in this place, and that we should be ready to lay our lives down for the noble principals represented by its founding fathers. Remember? One of these was “no taxation without representation”. I have spent the total years of my adulthood unlearning that crap from only a few years of my childhood. These days anyone who really stands up for that principal is promptly labeled a “crackpot”, traitor and worse.

    While very few working people would say they haven’t had their fair share of taxes (as can I), in my lifetime I can say with a great degree of certainty that there has never been a politician cast a vote on any matter with the likes of me or my interests in mind. Nor, for that matter, are they the least bit interested in me or anything I have to say.

    Why is it that a handful of thugs and plunderers can commit unthinkable atrocities (and in the case of the GM executives, for scores of years) and when it’s time for their gravy train to crash under the weight of their gluttony and overwhelming stupidity, the force of the full federal government has no difficulty coming to their aid within days if not hours? Yet at the same time, the joke we call the American medical system, including the drug and insurance companies, are murdering tens of thousands of people a year and stealing from the corpses and victims they cripple, and this country’s leaders don’t see this as important as bailing out a few of their vile, rich cronies. Yet, the political “representatives” (thieves, liars, and self-serving scumbags is far more accurate) have endless time to sit around for year after year and debate the state of the “terrible health care problem”. It’s clear they see no crisis as long as the dead people don’t get in the way of their corporate profits rolling in.

    And justice? You’ve got to be kidding!

    How can any rational individual explain that white elephant conundrum in the middle of our tax system and, indeed, our entire legal system? Here we have a system that is, by far, too complicated for the brightest of the master scholars to understand. Yet, it mercilessly “holds accountable” its victims, claiming that they’re responsible for fully complying with laws not even the experts understand. The law “requires” a signature on the bottom of a tax filing; yet no one can say truthfully that they understand what they are signing; if that’s not “duress” than what is. If this is not the measure of a totalitarian regime, nothing is.

    How did I get here?

    My introduction to the real American nightmare starts back in the early ‘80s. Unfortunately after more than 16 years of school, somewhere along the line I picked up the absurd, pompous notion that I could read and understand plain English. Some friends introduced me to a group of people who were having ‘tax code’ readings and discussions. In particular, zeroed in on a section relating to the wonderful “exemptions” that make institutions like the vulgar, corrupt Catholic Church so incredibly wealthy. We carefully studied the law (with the help of some of the “best”, high-paid, experienced tax lawyers in the business), and then began to do exactly what the “big boys” were doing (except that we weren’t steeling from our congregation or lying to the government about our massive profits in the name of God). We took a great deal of care to make it all visible, following all of the rules, exactly the way the law said it was to be done.

    The intent of this exercise and our efforts was to bring about a much-needed re-evaluation of the laws that allow the monsters of organized religion to make such a mockery of people who earn an honest living. However, this is where I learned that there are two “interpretations” for every law; one for the very rich, and one for the rest of us… Oh, and the monsters are the very ones making and enforcing the laws; the inquisition is still alive and well today in this country.

    That little lesson in patriotism cost me $40,000+, 10 years of my life, and set my retirement plans back to 0. It made me realize for the first time that I live in a country with an ideology that is based on a total and complete lie. It also made me realize, not only how naive I had been, but also the incredible stupidity of the American public; that they buy, hook, line, and sinker, the crap about their “freedom”… and that they continue to do so with eyes closed in the face of overwhelming evidence and all that keeps happening in front of them.

    Before even having to make a shaky recovery from the sting of the first lesson on what justice really means in this country (around 1984 after making my way through engineering school and still another five years of “paying my dues”), I felt I finally had to take a chance of launching my dream of becoming an independent engineer.

    On the subjects of engineers and dreams of independence, I should digress somewhat to say that I’m sure that I inherited the fascination for creative problem solving from my father. I realized this at a very young age.

    The significance of independence, however, came much later during my early years of college; at the age of 18 or 19 when I was living on my own as student in an apartment in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. My neighbor was an elderly retired woman (80+ seemed ancient to me at that age) who was the widowed wife of a retired steel worker. Her husband had worked all his life in the steel mills of central Pennsylvania with promises from big business and the union that, for his 30 years of service, he would have a pension and medical care to look forward to in his retirement. Instead he was one of the thousands who got nothing because the incompetent mill management and corrupt union (not to mention the government) raided their pension funds and stole their retirement. All she had was social security to live on.

    In retrospect, the situation was laughable because here I was living on peanut butter and bread (or Ritz crackers when I could afford to splurge) for months at a time. When I got to know this poor figure and heard her story I felt worse for her plight than for my own (I, after all, I thought I had everything to in front of me). I was genuinely appalled at one point, as we exchanged stories and commiserated with each other over our situations, when she in her grandmotherly fashion tried to convince me that I would be “healthier” eating cat food (like her) rather than trying to get all my substance from peanut butter and bread. I couldn’t quite go there, but the impression was made. I decided that I didn’t trust big business to take care of me, and that I would take responsibility for my own future and myself.

    Return to the early ‘80s, and here I was off to a terrifying start as a ‘wet-behind-the-ears’ contract software engineer… and two years later, thanks to the fine backroom, midnight effort by the sleazy executives of Arthur Andersen (the very same folks who later brought us Enron and other such calamities) and an equally sleazy New York Senator (Patrick Moynihan), we saw the passage of 1986 tax reform act with its section 1706.

    For you who are unfamiliar, here is the core text of the IRS Section 1706, defining the treatment of workers (such as contract engineers) for tax purposes. Visit this link for a conference committee report ( regarding the intended interpretation of Section 1706 and the relevant parts of Section 530, as amended. For information on how these laws affect technical services workers and their clients, read our discussion here (


    (a) IN GENERAL – Section 530 of the Revenue Act of 1978 is amended by adding at the end thereof the following new subsection:

    (d) EXCEPTION. – This section shall not apply in the case of an individual who pursuant to an arrangement between the taxpayer and another person, provides services for such other person as an engineer, designer, drafter, computer programmer, systems analyst, or other similarly skilled worker engaged in a similar line of work.

    (b) EFFECTIVE DATE. – The amendment made by this section shall apply to remuneration paid and services rendered after December 31, 1986.


    · “another person” is the client in the traditional job-shop relationship.

    · “taxpayer” is the recruiter, broker, agency, or job shop.

    · “individual”, “employee”, or “worker” is you.

    Admittedly, you need to read the treatment to understand what it is saying but it’s not very complicated. The bottom line is that they may as well have put my name right in the text of section (d). Moreover, they could only have been more blunt if they would have came out and directly declared me a criminal and non-citizen slave. Twenty years later, I still can’t believe my eyes.

    During 1987, I spent close to $5000 of my ‘pocket change’, and at least 1000 hours of my time writing, printing, and mailing to any senator, congressman, governor, or slug that might listen; none did, and they universally treated me as if I was wasting their time. I spent countless hours on the L.A. freeways driving to meetings and any and all of the disorganized professional groups who were attempting to mount a campaign against this atrocity. This, only to discover that our efforts were being easily derailed by a few moles from the brokers who were just beginning to enjoy the windfall from the new declaration of their “freedom”. Oh, and don’t forget, for all of the time I was spending on this, I was loosing income that I couldn’t bill clients.

    After months of struggling it had clearly gotten to be a futile exercise. The best we could get for all of our trouble is a pronouncement from an IRS mouthpiece that they weren’t going to enforce that provision (read harass engineers and scientists). This immediately proved to be a lie, and the mere existence of the regulation began to have its impact on my bottom line; this, of course, was the intended effect.

    Again, rewind my retirement plans back to 0 and shift them into idle. If I had any sense, I clearly should have left abandoned engineering and never looked back.

    Instead I got busy working 100-hour workweeks. Then came the L.A. depression of the early 1990s. Our leaders decided that they didn’t need the all of those extra Air Force bases they had in Southern California, so they were closed; just like that. The result was economic devastation in the region that rivaled the widely publicized Texas S&L fiasco. However, because the government caused it, no one gave a shit about all of the young families who lost their homes or street after street of boarded up houses abandoned to the wealthy loan companies who received government funds to “shore up” their windfall. Again, I lost my retirement.

    Years later, after weathering a divorce and the constant struggle trying to build some momentum with my business, I find myself once again beginning to finally pick up some speed. Then came the .COM bust and the 911 nightmare. Our leaders decided that all aircraft were grounded for what seemed like an eternity; and long after that, ‘special’ facilities like San Francisco were on security alert for months. This made access to my customers prohibitively expensive. Ironically, after what they had done the Government came to the aid of the airlines with billions of our tax dollars … as usual they left me to rot and die while they bailed out their rich, incompetent cronies WITH MY MONEY! After these events, there went my business but not quite yet all of my retirement and savings.

    By this time, I’m thinking that it might be good for a change. Bye to California, I’ll try Austin for a while. So I moved, only to find out that this is a place with a highly inflated sense of self-importance and where damn little real engineering work is done. I’ve never experienced such a hard time finding work. The rates are 1/3 of what I was earning before the crash, because pay rates here are fixed by the three or four large companies in the area who are in collusion to drive down prices and wages… and this happens because the justice department is all on the take and doesn’t give a fuck about serving anyone or anything but themselves and their rich buddies.

    To survive, I was forced to cannibalize my savings and retirement, the last of which was a small IRA. This came in a year with mammoth expenses and not a single dollar of income. I filed no return that year thinking that because I didn’t have any income there was no need. The sleazy government decided that they disagreed. But they didn’t notify me in time for me to launch a legal objection so when I attempted to get a protest filed with the court I was told I was no longer entitled to due process because the time to file ran out. Bend over for another $10,000 helping of justice.

    So now we come to the present. After my experience with the CPA world, following the business crash I swore that I’d never enter another accountant’s office again. But here I am with a new marriage and a boatload of undocumented income, not to mention an expensive new business asset, a piano, which I had no idea how to handle. After considerable thought I decided that it would be irresponsible NOT to get professional help; a very big mistake.

    When we received the forms back I was very optimistic that they were in order. I had taken all of the years information to Bill Ross, and he came back with results very similar to what I was expecting. Except that he had neglected to include the contents of Sheryl’s unreported income; $12,700 worth of it. To make matters worse, Ross knew all along this was missing and I didn’t have a clue until he pointed it out in the middle of the audit. By that time it had become brutally evident that he was representing himself and not me.

    This left me stuck in the middle of this disaster trying to defend transactions that have no relationship to anything tax-related (at least the tax-related transactions were poorly documented). Things I never knew anything about and things my wife had no clue would ever matter to anyone. The end result is… well, just look around.

    I remember reading about the stock market crash before the “great” depression and how there were wealthy bankers and businessmen jumping out of windows when they realized they screwed up and lost everything. Isn’t it ironic how far we’ve come in 60 years in this country that they now know how to fix that little economic problem; they just steal from the middle class (who doesn’t have any say in it, elections are a joke) to cover their asses and it’s “business-as-usual”. Now when the wealthy fuck up, the poor get to die for the mistakes… isn’t that a clever, tidy solution.

    As government agencies go, the FAA is often justifiably referred to as a tombstone agency, though they are hardly alone. The recent presidential puppet GW Bush and his cronies in their eight years certainly reinforced for all of us that this criticism rings equally true for all of the government. Nothing changes unless there is a body count (unless it is in the interest of the wealthy sows at the government trough). In a government full of hypocrites from top to bottom, life is as cheap as their lies and their self-serving laws.

    I know I’m hardly the first one to decide I have had all I can stand. It has always been a myth that people have stopped dying for their freedom in this country, and it isn’t limited to the blacks, and poor immigrants. I know there have been countless before me and there are sure to be as many after. But I also know that by not adding my body to the count, I insure nothing will change. I choose to not keep looking over my shoulder at “big brother” while he strips my carcass, I choose not to ignore what is going on all around me, I choose not to pretend that business as usual won’t continue; I have just had enough.

    I can only hope that the numbers quickly get too big to be white washed and ignored that the American zombies wake up and revolt; it will take nothing less. I would only hope that by striking a nerve that stimulates the inevitable double standard, knee-jerk government reaction that results in more stupid draconian restrictions people wake up and begin to see the pompous political thugs and their mindless minions for what they are. Sadly, though I spent my entire life trying to believe it wasn’t so, but violence not only is the answer, it is the only answer. The cruel joke is that the really big chunks of shit at the top have known this all along and have been laughing, at and using this awareness against, fools like me all along.

    I saw it written once that the definition of insanity is repeating the same process over and over and expecting the outcome to suddenly be different. I am finally ready to stop this insanity. Well, Mr. Big Brother IRS man, let’s try something different; take my pound of flesh and sleep well.

    The communist creed: From each according to his ability, to each according to his need.

    The capitalist creed: From each according to his gullibility, to each according to his greed.

    Joe Stack (1956-2010)


    史塔克宣言:被美国媒体河蟹的P民约瑟夫·史塔克(Joe Stack)遗书的中文翻译

    【译者注:有网友质疑美国媒体是否“河蟹”一事。如果你细读我信件翻译一节中的原话,我用的是此信“曾经被美国媒体河蟹”,而不是撞机这个事件被河蟹。这封信件被发现之后确实有几个小时美国主流媒体噤声不报道这封信,而且史塔克贴这封信的网站embeddedart.com曾经“被下线”,直到现在(12 个小时后)仍然没有完全恢复。各国都有媒体审查制度,美国也不例外。大家别太天真。】

    ========= 新闻背景 =========



      美国有线电视新闻网(CNN)的报道称,飞行员是名叫约瑟夫•安德鲁•斯 视频:美国一幢大楼被飞机撞击后起火来源:深圳卫视《正午30分》 泰克的男子,在撞机事件前曾在网上留下自杀遗言。








    ========= 信件翻译 =========



    当你读到这封信的时候,你无疑会问,“为什么会这样(驾机自杀撞击国税局大楼)?” 简单地说,原因很复杂而且我对这个事件的筹划由来已久。许多个月之前,我开始写这封信,是为了疗治我对这个世界悲观失望的情绪,那是一种意识到这个世界已破碎的事情毫无补救希望的绝望。无需多说,我对这个世界的出离愤怒可以写下一卷又一卷,如果我愿意写的话。但我发现,写下这些愤怒的过程让我沮丧,感到沉闷,而且写作这些事情可能是毫无意义的 … 尤其当狂怒的风暴席卷我的大脑时,我无法充分地陈述我的想法。我不知道怎样才能抚平我内心的创伤,但绝境下我会做出绝望的挣扎。

    小的时候我们被灌输这样的“常识”:没有法律就没有社会,那是无政府主义。悲惨的是,在这个国家(美国),我们从小就被洗脑被意识到,我们对这个国家的奉献和服务,换来的是政府对正义的主持。我们进一步被洗脑被相信,这个国家是自由的国度,而且我们应当为“崇高的自由主义”随时准备献出生命。可曾记得那句名言, “被代表就要被交税”(选出政府就要给政府纳税)。尽管我们小的时候被洗脑接受这些谬论只用两三年而已,我花了我整个成年的时间才意识到这纯属扯淡。在现在这个时代,任何人胆敢站起来对这个原理(“被代表就要被交税”)说不会立刻被打上“疯子”和“叛徒”的标签,以及面临更糟的待遇。


    为什么那撮暴徒和强盗可以犯下无法想象的暴行(比如通用汽车的总裁们好多年以来的所作所为),并且当他们的贪婪和无比愚蠢的行为最终带来灾难的时候,联邦政府却可以毫无保留地在几天甚至几个小时内救助他们化解危机?于此同时,当我们称之为笑料的美国医疗保健系统包括那些药品和保险公司,在每年谋杀数以万计的老百姓的时候,在掠夺他们(老百姓)的尸体欢呼他们(老百姓)的伤残的时候,这个国家的领导人却对此视而不见,反而在积极地救济他们那些卑劣的“老伙计” (华尔街资本家)。更可悲的是,那些政府的“代表们”(称呼他们为小偷,骗子和自私的混蛋更贴切)却在年复一年地空洞地讨论“糟糕的医保问题”而毫无行动。对他们来说,只要死老百姓不挡在他们赚钱的路上,一切危机对他们根本不是问题。




    我对这个制度的反思开始于80年代的美国噩梦。不幸的是,经过16年的学校教育,我才偶然去注意到税法中那些含糊和傲慢的条令,尽管这些条令都是些最普通的英文。一些朋友推荐我参加一个(普通纳税者组成的)学习小组,阅读和讨论“税法”。讨论的重点是税法中关于免税的一章,免税的对象包括粗俗腐败却出奇富有的天主教堂。在这个领域中最“好” 的、薪水最高、最有经验的税收律师的帮助下,我们(学习小组的成员)仔细研读了税法,然后做和那些“大男孩”做的同样的事情(但我们并没有像天主教堂那样打着上帝的名义却从信众中骗财以及向政府隐瞒巨额财富)。我们小心地光明正大地做事,遵守所有法令,就像法律允许我们做的那样。


    爱国的代价就是,4万美元的花销,10年的生命以及被清零的退休金。这让我第一次认识到我生活在一个完全建立在彻头彻尾谎言的国家。这也同时让我意识到,对美国公众,我曾经抱有极其幼稚且无法想象的愚蠢幻想,他们(公众)居然还相信并沉迷于 “自由主义”那一套垃圾 … 即使是堆积如山的证据摆在他们面前,他们依然能够继续视而不见。



    然 而直到我大学的前两年才认识清楚独立创业的重要性,那时我18、19岁,靠着打工来补助自己在宾夕法尼亚州哈里斯堡读大学。我的邻居是个退休的老太太(80多岁对我那个年纪的年轻人来说够老的了)是个已故钢铁工人的遗孀。他的亡夫曾在宾夕法尼亚中部的钢铁厂工作,那个大公司和工会许诺她的丈夫,如果工作30年就可以得到退休金和医疗保险。相反,他成了数千被缺乏竞争力的铁厂和腐败工会(更别提政府了)抛弃的P民,到头来一无所获,他存到养老基金的钱都被厂子和工会掠夺、窃取。老太太只能靠社会最低保障金度日。


    80年代初期,我签合同成了一个天真的软件工程师 … 两年后,“多谢”差劲的阿瑟·安德森(Arthur Andersen,安达信会计师事务总裁,改事务所所因卷入安然公司丑闻而遭到解体)和同样差劲的纽约州议员(丹尼尔·帕特里克·莫伊尼汉,Daniel Patrick Moynihan),1986年的税收改革法案以及其中的1706号条令通过议会正式生效。

    如果你不熟悉国税局的 1706号条令,这条条令规定了对劳动者(比如合同工程师)的税收政策。你可以访问这个链接(来阅读对 1706号条令以及530号修正案的解释。关于这些法令是如何影响技术服务雇员和他们客户的讨论,阅读这里(。


    1706 节,适用某些技术从业人员


    (d)例外:本节(530节)不适用于下述个人(从而这些职业可以不被法律保护): …. 工程师,设计师,制图师,程序员,系统分析师,或者其他从事类似职业的技术雇工。




    在 1987年,我花了将近5000美元的个人积蓄,以及至少1000小时的时间来写作、打印和邮寄给议员,政客,领导以及任何愿意听我意见的人。结果就是,没人愿意听,他们甚至普遍认为我在浪费他们的时间。我花了无数的时间在洛杉矶的高速公路上,去参见会议以及任何想要组织力量反对这一暴政的民间团体。然而,我却发现我们的努力轻易地就被那些经纪人中的叛徒们破坏了,他们想要开始享受所谓的“自由”了。噢,别忘了,我花了这么多时间和精力在上面,这给我带来了收入上的损失。



    然 而,浪子不知回头是金,我仍然沉浸在每个星期100个小时的工作中。然后洛杉矶迎来了90年代早期的大萧条。我们的国家领导人们决定不再需要南加州那些多余的空军基地,这些基地被关闭。悲剧性的结果就是导致该地区的经济劫难,其后果堪比广为人知的德克萨斯州的存贷惨案。但是,因为政府是造成这一切的根源,没人会在乎那些年轻的P民们,(因为失去工作)他们不得不放弃贷款购买的房子,这些房子被有政府补助的富有的借贷公司收回。再一次,我失去了我的退休金。

    几年后,随着一场不成功的婚姻的结束和我商业上的奋斗,我发现自己的事业终于有些起色。然而,接下来发生了.com泡沫和911梦魇。那时我们的国家领导们决定把所有的航线都停飞,而且不知何时可以重回运行;随后很久一段时间,“重点”区域比如旧金山处于数月的安全警告期(航空和地面运输受政府限制)。这让我联络客户的费用极大上升。讽刺的是,他们在做了这么多之后,政府用以数以十亿美元计的我们的纳税来补贴航空公司(因为交通限令亏损)… 和往常一样,他们(政府)让我腐烂和死亡,却用我的钱来救助那些富有的却缺乏竞争力的他们的“老伙计”!所有这些不幸的事件之后,我的事业没了,只剩下一些退休金和储蓄。

    那时,我想着也许该换个环境了。再见了加州,我要去奥斯汀(德州首府)试试运气。然后我搬到了奥斯汀,却发现这是个人人自我感觉过好却少有人脚踏实地做工程的地方。我在寻找工作上从来没遇到过如此艰难的时刻。薪水只有经济着陆前的三分之一,因为薪酬被3到4家这里的大公司所把持,而他们在不断降薪恶性竞争 … 这种事情发生和司法机关不无关系,司法机关根本不管P民死活,只在乎他们自己和他们“老伙计”的利益。




    这让我被置于灾难的中央,逼迫我为和税收根本无关的交易辩护,为那些我根本不知道和我太太认为根本不重要的事情辩护。结果就是 … 看看周围吧。

    我记得曾读到以前在大萧条前股票大跌的时候那些富有的银行家和商人因为一无所有然后跳楼的事情。讽刺的是,60年后,在这个国家,银行家和商人找到了如何解决经济问题的方法;他们从中产阶级那里偷窃(然而中产阶级却蒙在鼓里,选举是个笑话)以解决他们的经济危机。当富人们把事情搞砸时,穷人却要为富人的错误去死 … (对富人来说)这难道不是个聪明又漂亮的解决方案吗?

    谈到政府机构,联邦航空局基本上是个效率极其低下的墓碑机构(不出人命根本不屌你P 民),但航空局绝不是唯一的例子。最近的木偶总统乔治布什和他的“老伙计”在其执政8年里无疑让我们相信了这种批评适合所有的政府部门。它们不会做改变,除非出了人命或者政府里的人利益受到威胁。在这个从上到下伪善绝顶的政府里,P民的人命不值几个钱,它们的谎言和自利的法律也一样廉价。


    我希望数字(像我这样 的人的数量) 越来越大以至于不能被粉饰掉,以至于唤醒那些沉睡的美国僵尸(麻木的民众)起来暴动;它会席卷一切。我希望我的行为不可避免地触动政府作出双重标准的、下意识的反应,这个反应就是他们推出更多更愚蠢更苛刻的对民众自由的限制 — 这些限制会惊醒人民,让他们看清楚这些高傲的政治暴徒极其走狗的本质。可悲的是,虽然我耗尽此生努力相信暴力可以避免,但我终于醒悟,暴力不只是答案,暴力是唯一的答案。在这个残酷的笑话里,高高在上的那堆屎们一直知道真相,却始终利用真相来愚弄和嘲笑我们这群愚昧的P民。




  9. LazyCat says:

    “How to be a dead man”, according to some American guy…”

    There’s a fine line between genius and insanity; still the relevance escapes me.

  10. IKTIKN says:

    This sounds good.

    P.S I am even going to some of this list for myself.

  11. IKTIKN says:

    After to there was supposed to be a “copy”.

  12. GeMen says:

    Stuck on the plane of materialism and ego. The man is a spiritual infant.

  13. steveatobi says:

    How about some traditional Chinese wisdom:

    Service is the rent we pay for the privilege of living on this planet.
    If everybody is a worm you should be a glow worm.
    I am a fortune. You just broke my little house. Where will i live now?

    I got these out of fortune cookies, but it’s the message, not the messenger, that we should weigh first.

  14. Moo-shi Pork says:

    I liked the Chinese better when I look at them in photos from the 1930’s: with their pigtails, filthy hygiene, grovelling, superstitions, abject dirt-eating poverty, deformed feet, kowtowing etc. etc.

    Americans NEVER went through such a degraded phase.

    • Quinn says:

      I thought Americans moved on from that whole ignorant phase (African slavery) in a country with a Constitution that says, “All men are created equal..”. Grovelling? Really? Your history isn’t even close to half as rich in culture in comparasion . When you guys left the British you started off your history as Americans with all the ‘civilized’ knowledge the British had to discover in their past history just like the Chinese, just like every other older established country ! Superstitions? The Salem Witch Trials… Kowtowing was seen as etiquette, something maybe you might not understand. Honesty why would you even go there… your just making Americans look like pompous, uncultured ass’s which is a horrible stereotype ( Canadians make fun of you guys for thinking their kids ride polar -bears to school) My fiance is American and a few of my close friends are living the American Dream and never would they embarrass themselves like you just did.

  15. R.K. says:

    IF you can keep your head when all about you
    Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
    If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
    But make allowance for their doubting too;
    If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
    Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
    Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
    And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:
    If you can dream – and not make dreams your master;
    If you can think – and not make thoughts your aim;
    If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
    And treat those two impostors just the same;
    If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
    Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
    Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
    And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:

    If you can make one heap of all your winnings
    And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
    And lose, and start again at your beginnings
    And never breathe a word about your loss;
    If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
    To serve your turn long after they are gone,
    And so hold on when there is nothing in you
    Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

    If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
    ‘ Or walk with Kings – nor lose the common touch,
    if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
    If all men count with you, but none too much;
    If you can fill the unforgiving minute
    With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
    Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
    And – which is more – you’ll be a Man, my son!

  16. Christoph says:

    “Seems like lots of the advice isn’t about being a man but just some general trivial stuff. When people say things like “You can change about 70 percent of your fate” you know you aren’t exactly looking at a pro’s work,, or to go to the other ditch: some crap you get to listen to at an overpaid hack’s seminars about personal development. Yes Tony Robbins, I am looking at you.”

    Let me guess. Your net worth is well, well, well under a million dollars. If it’s indeed above 0.

    I’m sure when Tony Robbins reviews his stock portfolio, his personal real estate holdings, his business investments, his income and expense statements, the feel of his wife giving him a cuddle, etc., etc., and reading the letters from the athletes, artists, business people, politicians, and regular folks with various problems who’ve written to tell him how his philosophies have helped them improve their lot he’s going to feel really put out that “Lop” is disapprovingly “looking at him”.

  17. none says:

    Maybe I’m missing something here, but China Hush has resorted to reposting blatantly sexist diatribes for traffic?

    “Women are born to care about beauty”

    Or men with no money are women?

  18. Ronsonic says:

    I don’t know Chinese well enough to comment on which word best describes the sort of man being described. I do know English well enough to borrow from another language and would go with the Yiddish “Mensch.” Which has the association with a man of substance and character.

    As for the advice, I’d say from experience it is mostly solid and mostly universal. Mostly.

    • LazyCat says:

      I don’t know Chinese well enough either, but I know German enough to understand this:

      und der Mensch heißt Mensch
      weil er vergisst,
      weil er verdrängt
      und weil er staunt und stählt
      weil er wärmt, wenn er erzählt

      (Herbert Grönemeyer)

  19. 马修 says:

    I like these. They are smart. Haha this guy is no Zhuang Zi, but it is interesting .

    • ButterFly says:

      Once Zhuangzi dreamt he was a butterfly, a butterfly flitting and fluttering around, happy with himself and doing as he pleased. He didn’t know he was Zhuangzi. Suddenly he woke up and there he was, solid and unmistakable Zhuangzi. But he didn’t know if he was Zhuangzi who had dreamt he was a butterfly, or a butterfly dreaming he was Zhuangzi. Between Zhuangzi and a butterfly there must be some distinction! This is called the Transformation of Things…

  20. Nikki says:

    Anything that’s worth putting on a list of traits for a “good man” is worth putting on a general list for what it takes to be a good PERSON. Most things on this list are not gender-specific. You don’t think it’s a good idea for a woman to plan her future out? Women don’t have to eat well to stay healthy? I say bull.

  21. my father is a computer programmer for Alwill Software and it is a high paying job-‘-

  22. ordosincorporated says:

    He is wrong about astrology. Millionares dont need astrology. BILLIONARES need astrology. That is how he should have said it.

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